The Church of Vanilla

This photo has noting to do with anything. I just like it.

Wow, I just can't surf the theological web lately without coming across a story about Michele "Crazy Eyes" Bachmann. I want to read and see stories about finding Jesus or (You ain't no) Virgin Mary in bread products. The most recent trend story is how Bachmann did a Palin and switched churches.

Word around the water cooler is that Bachmann's husband is...the gay and other sutffs.

There was a lot of whoop-la in the last election cycle over The One leaving controversial Trinity United Church of Christ just because the pastor said, "Goddamn America (sheez, sensitive much people)." Even back in the day, Dwight D. Eisenhower left his super weirdo Jehovah's Witness religion for the more acceptable Presbyterian variety (1). Both dudes did the switcheroo to woo mainstream and middle of the way voters that may have thought their particular religion(s) were extreme-ish.

Julia, I'm glad you are an atheist and all, but dye your hair. Red is so Old Kriss.

Well, the ladies will not be outdone. A little while back Sarah "The Barracuda" Palin went from Pentecostal (2) to the very vanilla "bible believing Christian in a bible believing church (ugh, specific much)." Aaaaand, the new Sarah Palin, Michele "Crazy Eyes" Bachmann, recently did the switcheroo herself. Crazy Eyes went from the Catholic Pope is the anti Christ Lutheran church to some mainstream vanilla church called Eagle Brook. The reason why all of the above made the move away from their churches is to court those very important votes that they covet.

She looks different in this photo.

Fo sho people, even politicians, have the right to switch churches anytime they want for any reason. What gets this particular New Atheist is that religion is still a requirement to run for the most important office (read in a God like voice) THE WOOOOORRRRRLLLLLDDDD. It is the definition of religious privilege. (Nonexistent) Heaven forbid an atheist tries to run for President of the United States, that would totally be controversial (and that in itself would be a controversy). The unwritten rule is that one must have faith, preferably Christian, to run for office. As far as I know, only Australia has an atheist in the top leadership position.

So the two Evangelical Feminists switched churches so they could run for office, big frackin' deal. They have changed their stripes, and yet they remain the same. It doesn't matter what church Crazy Eyes belongs to she still believes that creationism should be taught in the science classroom and also that one can "pray away the gay (3)." She may have left behind her Lutheran-the Pope is the anti Christ-church, but she is still an end of times-timer. They may be successful in attracting mainstream voters by switching to less controversial churches...and that fellow Team Atheist members, that is the frackin' problem.

(1) Dwight's J.W. church was not into saluting the flag or serving in the military and he thought that might make some voters angry. Ya think.

(2) Pentecostal are the ones (I know its hard to keep track of them all, there are so many) that believe in the healing of the hands, or is it laying of the hands, faith healing stuffs and are the snake handlers.

(3) A couple of thingies here. First there is talk that Bachmann's husband (he doesn't have his own identity) is the gay. It's a joke of course, but it is a funny joke. Second his clinic specializes in praying away the gay, even tho they deny that and they call it Christian conseling. Whatever.

* For those keeping score. I have an appt. today and they may or may not be able to get me the meds that I need. Once again, thanks to all for the support. It may not seem like it (because I'm tortured by all the suffering. It hurts, it really hurts so much every day, every moment that I'm awake peeps), but I appreciate the kind gestures.

* Article RNS