Well Played, Young Man

Go Giants

Aubrey "Freekin" Huff. Brother, you are my brother. Hats off to you. I'm proud of you. It is unprecedented and courageous of you. You told the truth. Kind gentle and very goodlooking readers YOU knooooowwwwww my struggles with depression/anxiety this past year (thanks for sticking with me my internet and reality peeps. thanks) and how damaging it can be to the depressed and those around the depressed. Professional sports is super sexist, kinda stupid and super macho. Never show weakness, never let them see you cry or be down. Just win baby, win.

The San Francisco Giants (yippie) put first baseman, Aubrey Huff, on the 15 day disabled list for, get this...."for an anxiety disorder." In this is a great article in SF Chron the author (I didn't see the name) went all full disclosure and shared that s/he also has struggled with anxiety and depression.

If I had a nickel for every time I cried and held my face in my hands, I'd be a...

" I have struggled with whether to say this publicly, and how to do it, but this gives me a good opening. Since 2009 I have been treated for depression, in therapy and medicinally, and continue to be treated. Many awful things happened to me and people around me in a very short time, and my mental health was affected. Anxiety and panic attacks were part of it ( SF Gate)."

Even in this advanced day and age depression and anxiety are seen as weakness or some shit like that. Especially in poor and minority communities it is seen as "there is something wrong with you for choosing this...get your head outta your butt...c'mon now, I get bummed out sometimes also." In fact, all across the board (most) people will say the "pull up your boot straps...mind over matter, you can control this" shit. It's wrong and it's abusive.

Kudos to Aubrey Huff (and the writer) for being honest-n-shit and I hope so much that he is getting the proper (scientific) medical attention. Y'all that have supported me this past year KNOW, but for the peeps that do not have depression and anxiety it's like this...

This is my firearm and it is still not in my posession. Dammmm, I miss you baby. 357 yo.

This year for the first time evah evah...I wanted to kill myself. In fact I had thoughts and fantasies about killin' someone else and I'm a fuckin' hippie. I got depressed and anxious, then that led to frustration because I could acknowledge that this isn't Kriss (but I couldn't change it) and after the frustration came the anger. I think I now know why my father was so fucked up. He had what I have (or visa versa), but he didn't get help so fuck him.

I've been to Kenpo seminars with Jeff (it was just OK).I don't need a gun fer shit.

You can't "walk off" depression and you being "bummed out" then cheering up is an insult to those that have a chemical imbalance (fuck you). I know you mean well but don't ask me if I'm exercising because compared to you...I'm a stud. Why would a person that has a good job, lots of friends, a good social life, a good past and a great future, and that is happy go lucky start closing up and showing anger all the time. That is what depression is.

For the not-depressed you may be sayin' to yourself..."well gee wiz, he's a professional baseball player and a millionaire" what does he have to be depressed about. If you think something like that, then...I can't explain it to you.

"Huff Man" I wish you luck and a speedy recovery. Go Giants.

Kriss

* If you think depression is a choice, then come over to Sacramento and I'll punch you in the face, idiot.