The Smell Of God

I'd roll in this. Is that a dunk tank in the back-makes it even better.

OK, I halfta turn off my ancient computer when I'm eating breakfast cause I'll never finish eating at this rate. Guess who has a new fragrance...I'll just tell you...the freekin' Pope; yes that Pope.

Not only is B16 down with wearing the super ugly hats or cruising the blvd in that sick arse Pope Mobile, he's down for smelling good. Lemmie tell y'all, I was raised Catholic and when the priest and his entourage walk to the alter with that "incense" that smells like death...a little fragrance is OK by me.

Hello losers, check out my super ugly hats. B16 beeotches.

OK, so let the jokes begin. "Kriss, what does it smell like. Does it smell like boys being raped, the blood of Christ, boy butt, Ben Gay, stale crackers and boys butt." Sorry to disappoint but, as the French say, "non." Italian boutique perfume maker, Silvana Casoli, made this exclusive fragrance outta lime tree, verbana and grass. The entire list of ingredients is just as secret as the church itself. But the parfume maker did say that her delicate creation is "based on his love on nature." I'll say it so you don't halfta...that's where the smell of young boy comes in, right.

This Casoli is quite the popular elitist boutique proprietor. Customers include Madonna (the one that posed naked, not the holy one), Sting and a King or two. Previous holy scents include Water of Faith and Water of Hope. This is so cool. While many churches are closing down because of the economy, while the services for the poor (their only redeeming endeavor) are being cut to nill, a pedophile protector  can smell of "hope" and "faith" while simultaneously taking away the hope and faith of a young boy. How convenient  and by convenient I mean disgusting.

Italy is kinda cool.

Here's the other side of that fragrant coin. She also makes one called Italy which I imagine smells like the sex parties of their disgraced President Bunga Bunga. There is one called Cannabis which is supposed to be hypnotic (1) and a forbidden one called Nude. Oh joy where do I begin with that one...

"...inspired by the smell of a woman's skin when in the state of ecstasy." Ooorrrr, my interpretation, the smell of sweat, jizz, stale alcohol and cannabis, but not the perfume, the real stuff, gasoline, err I mean cocaine and cigarettes. Because I was raised Catholic, it also smells like guilt and sin, like I have done something wrong. In fact it smells like Hell because that is where I would go if it existed, there I said it. It smells like a musty old blues song and me loading my gun as I leave thru the back window. OK, I'm finished.

There is enuff hair on this cooch equivalent to 80 twenty-something females of 2012.

So B16 wears enuff bling to make hip hop artists envy. His ride is the ultimate and it comes with dudes running along side of it. And now he has his own fragrance. To bad we can't buy it. It is exclusively for the Pope. It couldn't be anyother way, peeps. If it was for everyone, then they wouldn't be that exclusive and elitist club that Team Atheist calls the...church.

(1) I have a version of the perfume called Cannabis...it's called smoking weed.

I like blond hair lately.